Valentines, The Day To Love Yourself…
365 days ago, if you told me how I was spending this Valentines, I would have thought you were crazy. I was fully prepared to embark on a life with someone I knew couldn’t give me the emotional fulfilment I craved, but it was good enough.
368 days ago I had just arrived back from a 5 star tour around Sri Lanka, it was the holiday of a lifetime. I thought everything was perfect. And when we were away, it generally was.
But the reality was very different.
329 days ago we went into lockdown. A pivotal moment in our relationship. We decided to isolate separately. That decision highlighted everything we needed to know. After 4 years together, we just weren’t on the same page. The future I had imagined wasn’t real. It was a complete fantasy. I began to realise that the images I had in my head for the future were total fiction. I began to realise that 4 years of trying, tolerating, hoping things would change, had come to a crashing halt.
That’s hard!
But I read Glennon Doyle’s book Untamed, and I realised I can do hard stuff.
I’ve done hard stuff before.
No more tolerating.
No more making do.
No more it’s OK.
194 days ago, after months of backwards and forwards, my relationship I had worked so hard on was finally over. 87 days of intense NLP, coaching and therapy and I started to discover who I was and who I wanted to be. You see, when I get into these situations, I don’t hang around thinking I might feel better with the passage of time. I don’t sit waiting for something to happen. I work hard. I focus. Sometimes my therapist thinks I do this too much. She encouraged me to “sit with my feelings”. Which I did, but not for long. I have a life to live and 42 years has already gone.
88 days ago I Matched with someone online.
I had had a couple of dates with others, but I was convinced I wouldn’t start properly looking until summer 2021.But this guy, there was just something about him. The way he responded to me. Everything he said made total sense. Every answer to a question I had resonated with me. It wasn’t a feeling I was used to.
Today I am spending the day with the love of my life and our kids. When people told me over the years “when you know, you know”, I didn’t know. Now I do. I know who I am, where I am going and who I am going with.
The start of an amazing journey of discovery.
What are you tolerating? What are you accepting as OK? What do you want to change?
It may not be as dramatic as a whole relationship, It could be your relationship with yourself.
That is the most important relationship of all.
But don’t wait for the years to pass. Don’t hope things will just magically change.Changing takes work. And it’s bloody hard. Are you ready for hard? You know what’s even harder?
Staying as you are. Tolerating the OK. Putting up with just good enough.
Living in a head full of fantasy. That’s the real hard stuff. Doing nothing and just wishing. That’s hard.
Are you ready?
Ready for commitment to yourself
Ready for a new start
Ready to build your confidence
Ready to find who you want to be.
If you are ready, I'd Love to work with you - Join me for a totally free Discovery Call HERE and lets chat about what your future might look like!
How many more days are you willing to let slip by?
Have a Powerful Day!
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Jenny Jarvis is a practicing, certified, UK Holistic Life Change Coach and NLP Specialist who has empowered numerous people to live a life of their dreams, unleash their relationship with money and start and grow brands and businesses to great success. A truly inspirational individual, Jenny is also the mum to two amazing teens, a Reiki Master and motivational speaker. She inspires all to harness their greatness through energised coaching sessions, workshops and her membership club. Book a free introductory session with Jenny HERE and discovery how you might work together. Or why not get started with her FREE 'Life Change Kickstart' Mini course HERE
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